Coffee or Tea?
by Tickle Me Rainbow
Summary: They say Revenge is sweet—but when it backfires on you, it's undeniably sour. Oneshot.


**Coffee or Tea?**

**Based on The Fools' Tournament by Shenjay**

**Jun x Ham, Ham x Min**

_They say Revenge is sweet—but when it backfires on you, it's undeniably sour._

* * *

><p>Nimble fingers tugged gently at the white, ribbon headpiece that was weaved into crimpled russet locks, adjusting it until it was nearly perfect. Burning carmine irises flared with delight. Lightly glossed lips curled into a tiny, charming smile. Hamuko shivered with elation, more than content with her appearance.<p>

She had been buttoning the collar of her bodice when her fellow co-worker had waltzed in. The Japanese woman of twenty-three had quickly become one of Hamuko's acquaintances, along with a handful of the staff. She had dubbed herself Hamuko's mentor when the girl had first started working at popular Café.

"Seikatsu-chan, your little friend is back," cooed the woman, "and he brought his own friend, too."

Hamuko blinked. "Minato brought someone?"

"Yeah, some guy with a cap. Is he a friend of yours too?"

Her deep red eyes widened a fraction larger; recognition settling itself within the depths of her conscious. A wide grin bloomed across her face. She flashed her co-worker an innocent smile as she smoothed out the wrinkles of her apron.

"Maybe," Hot carmine sizzled sinisterly.

Challenge accepted.

* * *

><p>"So you're not messing with me, right? She actually wears a maid outfit?"<p>

Minato couldn't help but allow a vainglorious expression slide onto his lips. He observed as Junpei practically bounced in his sit, apprehension radiating from every fiber of his being. Oh, he _couldn't _wait to see the stunned expression on Hamuko's face when she saw that Junpei was here. The satisfaction of outdoing her would be pleasantly addictive when he would get to witness her discomfort.

"I'm not joking," he mumbled in response, sinking leisurely into the cushion of his seat. Polished cobalt eyes gleamed with amusement; Junpei considerably brighten, his fingers drumming on the table-top almost frantically. They slipped into a thick, suspenseful silence then, with Junpei glancing around hungrily and Minato struggling to stay awake.

Luckily enough for them, they didn't have to wait any longer.

Glossy ebon dress shoes tapped along the decorative, tile floor. Slim legs clad in black, sheer tights moved gracefully underneath a knee-high skirt. Hamuko clutched the circular tray against her apron with her delicate, yet strong hands, as she halted right before her comrades' table.

She leaned forward, placing one hand on the table for support. A pleasant smile was plastered on her glistening lips, while she fluttered her thick lashes for an added effect. She met Junpei's dark eyes in a heated gaze, easily ignoring the pair of cobalt that was peering at her from the side. Then she purred.

"Would you like coffee or tea, sir?"

Junpei gapped. Minato blanched.

_Fuck_.

* * *

><p>The entire night was a disaster. Once Hamuko had swayed back to their table—her skirt fluttering gently with each step and her bodice looking tighter than usual around her bosom—it only got <strong>worse<strong>.

Although she acknowledged his existence, her boiling carmine eyes were strictly focused on Junpei. _The entire time_. And he was desperately soaking up her attention, too; leeching off her flirtatious words and antics all while wholeheartedly responding with his own cheesy, yet charming one-liners.

It was disgusting, the way those two were acting. It was appalling that they could just blatantly have bristling hot _eye sex_—**right in front of him**.

* * *

><p>The entire night was a success. And it continuously got <em>better<em> when Hamuko returned with his order.

He knows that they're only supposed to be friends—he knows that it's only natural for her to flaunt her beauty. He knows she doesn't immediately realize just what kind of long lasting effect she has on his body and mind. She's his wickedly attractive sister from another mister.

Just because they can never actually get physical, does not mean he can't enjoy the feast that she's carting on a silver platter. And he's pretty sure she's waving her delicious body around with some sort of underlying motive—probably something that involves Minato, _as it usually does_—but as long as she doesn't outright tell him he's not allowed to look, he's going to continue indulging in the aroma of this meal.

* * *

><p>Junpei likes to think, that one of the best moments of the night was when some old uptight business man dropped his wallet on the floor before he left. Aside from admiring his best friend for her act of kindness, he also got to admire that cute ass of hers.<p>

The brunette had bent down, an ivory sea of scallops clustering the edge of her dress. From in-between those ruffles and the end of stockings, he could seen strips of creamy skin and the curve of her supple cheeks, covered in something dark and lacey.

He couldn't stop himself from groaning aloud, which brought him a glare from cold cobalt eyes from across the table. If he wasn't so distracted with imagining his best friend bending over in a different position, then he would have smirked at his seething comrade.

* * *

><p>"Jun-pie," <em>there she goes, fluttering her eyelashes again,<em> "Would you like to try our cake? It's sugary sweet."

"Sure, Hamu-tan! Though, there's something else that I'd like to try too. I have a feeling it tastes just as sugary sweet…"

"Ff, oh Jun-pie, that was horrible."

"What? It sounded more suave in my head…"

"You're such a creep sometimes—"

Minato slammed his mug onto the counter, his eyes closed in irritation. He didn't need Hamuko to realize that he was exceedingly annoyed by their playful barter.

"More coffee, please." He demanded dryly.

Hamuko snorted. "Coming right up, _sir_."

* * *

><p>As soon as Hamuko disappeared into the kitchen in the back, Junpei flung himself across the table. He grabbed Minato's hands, a broad grin painfully etched across his face.<p>

"I love you, man."

Calmly, Minato pried his hands from Junpei's grasp. He bitterly glared in the other direction before shrugging silently. He didn't want to say anything he might regret later.

* * *

><p>Eventually, Hamuko's shift was over. With an eager Junpei and peeved Minato, she had left the Café and returned back to the dorm. Minato had immediately stomped off to his room without another word, which left a snickering Hamuko and Junpei alone downstairs. They began making plans to hang out tomorrow after school, forgetting about Minato's silent tantrum.<p>

Once Junpei had retired to his room as well, along with the remaining members of SEES, Hamuko wasted no time checking on her favorite stoic comrade.

* * *

><p>"Stop sulking."<p>

"Get out of my bed."

"Not until you stop sulking."

"I'm _not_ sulking."

Hamuko snickered as she straddled the morose dark haired boy. Her hair was released from its usual pony-tail, instead tumbling off her shoulders in an unkempt manner. She was wearing one of his long-sleeved shirts; it hung loosely around her body, but it barely kept her panties hidden. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. He shuddered as her breathe fanned his shoulder blade.

"You know, you should work on your methods of revenge. It's becoming much too simple to thwart your plans. And of course, you should always remember that when I fight back, I fight **hard**."

Minato grunted, his arms shifting to encircle her waist. He pulled her flush against his chest just as she tilted her head to look him in the eye.

"You suck."

Scalding carmine shimmered, clashing violently with chilly cobalt. Her lips twitched upwards.

"You love me."

He grumbled underneath his breathe, frowning deeply at her. She giggled, moving until her mouth was beside his ear. His fingers flexed against her hips, giving her a light squeeze.

"So tell me," She whispered, hot breath fanning the shell of his ear, "Would you like _coffee_…"

His lips ghosted the junction of her neck and shoulder.

"Or _tea_?"

* * *

><p><strong>That was terrible. Why did I write that again? ;A; I APOLOGIZE FOR BURNING YOUR EYES WITH MY TERRIBLE WRITING. Half-way through, I started giving up until the end. I was originally going to leave it at "You love me," but I thought it was fitting to end it with the whole coffee or tea thing.<strong>

**Junpei's the Coffee and Minato's the Tea?**

**SYMBOLISM, HELL YEAH.**

**Err. Hope you like it Shenjay. That goes for anyone else who bothered reading it. Hope you enjoyed my weirdness. **


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